Searching for the Truth: Canada Questions

Thursday is the big day. I am boldly leading a fact finding expedition to the land of Canada. Last week I asked for your questions about this obscure realm. I will do my very best to find all the answers. If I cannot find an answer, rest assured I will make something up.

Thank you for all your wondrous queries. Please keep me and my expeditionary force in your thoughts this weekend as I expect the trip to be hellaciously harrowing. If you happen to be racing Ironman Canada in Whistler make sure to say hi at some point! Without further ado, here are your Canada Questions:

 

 

Why is illegal to to have a siren on your bike in Sudbury,Ont? Who does this?

 

Wondering if can find out if the Canadian Mounties are as sexy as I hear they are.

 

 

aside from how many bears do you expect to see on the course?

 

 

If Canadian’s do not have PBR in , what do the hipsters drink?

 

 

do you know what poutine is? If so what is your favorite kind? If not, report back after your trip.

 

 

if God didn’t want us to burn Canada, why did he make it out of wood and oil?

 

 

What language do they speak and is it difficult to learn as an adult?

 

 

why does Canada make you angry?

 

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Canada Questions

As you may know the dark and mysterious wilderness to the North of the US is a country called Canada. Frankly I know almost nothing about the place. Next week I am going on a fact finding expedition to a place called Whistler in the West of Canadia. The Gold Guys want me to do this research to determine if the strange and secretive Canadian people value precious metals in their society or it is is more a twig, leaf & pelt based economy.

While there I would be happy to find out anything you’re curious about. Please tweet me @dpalmertri and use the hashtag: #canadaquestion. I will do my absolute best to answer any and all questions. If you are not on twitter then maybe it’s time you joined? If you refuse to join then leave your #canadaquestion as a comment on here.

Send your questions about Canada in right away!

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The Gold Guys Present: Teddy’s Racing Tips

Well we have a big race right here in Minneapolis tomorrow. Teddy and The Gold Guys want to remind everyone racing to do a good job!

Here are three key tips:

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Have a treat after the race! Teddy loves popsicles alot. Even if he didn’t do the race he still feels he deserves a popsicle or two.

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Have something to drink. It’s getting humid. Have some fluids before, during, after. Probably best not to chew your water bottles, though.

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Keep a sharp eye out for trouble. The Minneapolis course has tons of turns and curves and other athletes and potholes! Stay alert and ride safe.

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Well Played

Ironman Frankfurt
The European Championship race was ferocious. The mens side didn’t look as deep as it has in the past but the top three were all in it to win it. Sebastian Kienle devastated everyone on the bike. Rode 4:12 and ran under 2:50 off that. Apparently Jan Frodeno got himself THREE flats during the ride but still went hard and earned third by running 2:43. To the Germans crushing it at home, well played.

Side note from Frankfurt, many of the female pros stated on social media that age group men significantly impacted their race dynamics on the bike. If we want a clean field of play for our female pros they need to be separated from the big bunches of age group men. If a pack of bros rolls through the women’s field they can drag weak swimmers straight to the front of the race. Major impact on how races play out. Races, let the women go to war with one another in peace without bro interference!

Josh at Red, White & Boom Half Marathon
My athlete Josh loves America and isn’t afraid to show it. He used his patriotic run shorts to get on TV at the race! Plus he ran a six minute personal best. Well played, sir. Also since he was wearing a Mill City Running jersey during the TV interview I expect he’s going to get a four to eight figure endorsement deal with the shop.

Patriotic Spokesmodel Josh is blowing up in the media right now.

Patriotic Spokesmodel Josh is blowing up in the media right now.

QR CD0.1 Farewell Tour
Since I fully expect Quintana Roo to send me my PRsix any day now I’m treating every ride on my CD0.1 like it’s my last. We’ve had some great times together and I will always have a special place in my heart for my CD0.1. I’m just focused on making the most of the little time we have left together.

I will always love you, CD0.1 but I'm very excited to replace you as soon as possible with a PRsix.

I will always love you, CD0.1 but I’m very excited to replace you as soon as possible with a PRsix.

Lifetime Minneapolis
My heel is coming around but I have not been able to prepare enough to race yet. So I will be out and about at Nokomis on Saturday but won’t race. Will I have Peace Coffee to sponsor you with? Of course. Why would you even ask that, you know I will. Will I have solid gold bullion courtesy of the Gold Guys to hand out? Probably not but you will have to come chat with me on race day to be sure. I mean, what if I was handing out gold and you missed it?
FYI it is VERY swampy around Nokomis so you will enjoy a robustly fragrant run. Also much of the run path is still underwater but that may dry out in time. Also ride a mountain bike because the roads are yeah, um, pretty nice or whatever. Maybe just don’t worry about it.

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Winning in Waconia: Exciting Conclusion for the Gold Guys Best Friends Relay

We won! Jeremy, Steve and I were triumphant in our debut relay together. Our victory was all in the name of friendship. On race morning we were confronted with a very aggressive rival relay of Sean “Easy Peasy” Pease and his posse of rowdy ruffians. I’ve stated  before how I don’t believe in trash talk and would never partake in such behavior myself but these meddlesome hooligans had plenty to say. They were quite intent on defeating our Best Friends Squad and made their intention known in no uncertain terms. I won’t repeat the kind of unsavory phrases they employed during their verbal assault. Thankfully they were all talk.

Their swimmer got a bit of a lead over us even though Steve swam super splendidly because he has the heart of a champion and the body of a hobbit Ryan Lochte. I had to try to catch Seaneasy Peasy on the bike. Sean’s body is littered with tattoos and based on that you’d think he’s a real tough guy. Well when I passed him on the bike he wasn’t so tough. His bluster and bravado disappeared when he realized he was about to get mashed like potatoes before thanksgiving dinner. I mashed him real good. I rolled into T2 and handed our timing chip off to Jeremy who swiftly set out to seal our victory on the run. As I watched him start I couldn’t help but think of the great Olympian Lasse Viren. Jeremy is just that good. A haggard, though still belligerent, Seaneasy stumbled into transition over three and a half minutes later. Game over. They’d need Paul Tergat to even come close to closing the gap.

Even though the ruffian relay started all the trouble we, the best friends relay, are willing to forgive them. We believe so strongly in friendship that we may one day be friends with them in spite of their uncouth conduct.

Waconia is truly a gem here in Minnesota. The bike course has some hills but still really feels fast. There was doubt as to whether the race would continue this year but thankfully Final Stretch took the reigns and is keeping the event going strong. Never forget how lucky we are to have so many incredible venues here! We suffer through winter but these types of races make it all worthwhile.

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Sometimes even a rascal like Seaneasy shows some class and sportsmanship.

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Swagger in our step.

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Thea brought Teddy out to watch. He seemed to be waiting for the hotdogs.

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Yes I used my phone to Strava my ride and yes I got a KOM on my QR CD0.1. On a PRsix I could have gotten three KOMs.

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Steve delivering the chip! That guy is so strong and so fast.

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My time trial outfit. Gear West Bike skinsuit & shoe covers. Gold Guys Golden Helmet. And as always powered by Peace Coffee.

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Teddy can be a trickster sometimes.

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Seaneasy & I waiting for our swimmers. Notice his arrogant & abrasive demeanor.

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Jeremy sailing in to the finish.

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Brandon ran for the ruffians relay. Sad to see a good kid fall in with a bad crowd. He did try hard though.

 

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The Gold Guys Present: Teddy’s Training Tips: Explore

First, Teddy wants to remind you to look out for The Gold Guys Best Friends Relay composed of Steve Stenzel, myself, and Jeremy Reichenberger at the Waconia Tri on Sunday.

Teddy is always eager to check out someplace new. He knows there are interesting new smells to be smelled just around the corner and new stuff to be chewed and new critters to chase after. He has his regular routes for walks he like just fine but he’s always open to small changes that make the routes better. When he gets the chance he’s always excited about sniffing his way around somewhere new.

This year I’ve tried to take Teddy’s attitude about exploring with my own running and riding routes. I’ve found many small changes that dramatically improve the quality of a route. In some instances taking a slight variation can be safer, quieter, or have less stopping, or just more scenic. Are there better options on your loops a block or two away? In one instance I literally used a road one block south of my previous route and it was FAR superior- safer, nicer, less stopping. There have been plenty of dead ends but the process of exploring is always interesting and I’m very grateful when I do develop a better route. Teddy says explore! Make a change and see if you can find a new and interesting place to run or ride.

Teddy just did some exploring at Minnehaha Falls:

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Also, Teddy made a new friend Elle! Image

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The Gold Guys Best Friends Relay: RUNNER ANNOUNCEMENT

Weekend Update

One of the great things about Peace Coffee is that they deliver coffee by bike. In that tradition I rode out to the Lake Minnetonka tri on Saturday morning with a backpack full of beans. Well, a backpack full of bags of beans. The race started pretty early so I figured the athletes would really appreciate a caffeine sponsorship. It was great to see tons of friends and teammates racing. Lots of folks from Hopkins Masters were racing or volunteering. Gear West Bike athletes won for both the men and women. Heather Lendway, who is crushing it pretty hard this year, led the race out of T2. Brooks Grossinger started the run first man and second overall! He really had to hustle. My pal Ross had a good day in the swim, which was exciting. We’ve been working on his swim for a year now. You may be surprised to hear that swimming consistently 2-4 times a week and doing a few swim lessons and using appropriate swim tools and doing appropriate sets will make you a much better swimmer. Ross reported that he was able to pick out who he wanted to draft off and stay on their feet! When someone moved around him and got in the way he was able to repass and then drop that person to reclaim to prized feet ahead. Being engaged and aggressive in a race like that is huge if you want to be competitive.

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I found Aaron from the Peace Coffee team!

Hawes got a double thumbs up for pulling off a double race weekend! Tonka Sat & Manitou Sun.

Hawes got a double thumbs up for pulling off a double race weekend! Tonka Sat & Manitou Sun.

Sunday Ross and I rode over to Lake Phalen in St Paul to watch the inaugural Capital City Tri and the Best of the US race. Our teammate Matt Payne torched it. Matt, like Lendway and Ruth Brennan-Morrey, is on fire this year. I offered him a donut at 5k of the run but he declined. It great to shout at people while they go fast. Ross and I literally rolled up to the park as my athlete Tom was coming into the finish of the Cap City Tri. I was pretty excited about that timing and based on that I’m claiming to have super great intuition. Josh Blankenheim, who won the Cap City race, said he bases everything he does off of Teddy’s Training Tips. You’re welcome, Josh. If you’re looking to start winning you better get on board with Teddy’s advice. Check back Fridays. Also I may have yelled Go Gophers at the women’s winner of BOUS, Dani Fischer. She is a Badger. Listen up Badgers, if you’re going to come race over here I’m going to yell Go Gophers at you and I’m not going to apologize. So, if she heard me yell Go Gophers I’d like to officially state that I am not sorry.

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Relay Runner

My Best Friend For Now Steve Stenzel and I are proud to announce that our official new Best Friend for the Gold Guys Best Friends Relay at the Waconia Triathlon is Jeremy Reichenberger! Congrats Jeremy and thanks to all the applicants. Steve and I were inundated with innumerable incredible applications. Absolutely inundated. I’d like to say thank you and maybe we can be friends someday to Aaron, Kyle, Karin and especially Dan. Dan applied twice showing real ambition and initiative. Hats off to you Dan, but sadly Jeremy’s resume was too strong this time. Jeremy is a Gopher Alum, he has a great amount of facial hair (not too much, not too little), he has remarkable American Flag running shorts, and he is from Waconia! A perfect fit. We three will be racing Sunday to show the power of friendship.

ImageI saw Steve at the pool this morning and guided him through his last serious swim session before the weekend.

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